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Thursday, April 17, 2003

Have you ever felt inadequate? As in no matter how hard you try and put the effort in.. you have nothing to show for it? Well..thats how i felt last nite! I crashed and burned in the SEF midsemester! And the worse of it is that.. it wasnt as if i didnt study enough for it or anything. I studied for a good 3 days straight.. to the point where i couldnt take anymore in.. and i had no questions to ask anyone. I was sick of studying for it by that stage. What really upsets me the most is that.. i put soo much effort in.. more than i let anyone else realised... yet i think i fully flunked that exam!

I knew from that start that everyone else had an advantage over me in this subject. I've never done PSDB before.. so this subject was all new for me. So i made it my goal to try harder and do better so that i'm at the same level as everyone else. Now i know.. i can never try and catch up!

I hated it..cos right after the exam.. everyone just kept talking about it. It makes me feel worse.. because you hear what everyone else put down as their answers.. and then realise how wrong your one was! I couldnt stop it either. It was all around me.. lucky for me.. Mamo sat with me on the train and i "avoided" having to talk to ppl who got their answers right. We talked about other depressing stuff.. but it was good to get it off my chest.

As soon as i got home.. i rang Will.. and it wasnt until i said "i tried harder and wanted to do well" that i started crying! Its just not fair! Anyways, nothing a little Mindy-therapy followed by chocolates and sweets couldnt solve. I wont try to think about it anymore. I cant change whats already happened. I'm glad its raining tho.. cos it suits my mood atm!

Well..its been an AGE since i last blogged.. i just had alot of things on my mind (aka. SEF midsem and CMS stage 2) so i'll catch up on things i've been doing.

Saturday
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I went into uni to do some work on my CMS assignment with Amparo. It was good.. we had a good chat..and got a good deal of work done. We even had lunch at Oportos! Yum! That stuff is truly addictive. Will was also at uni that day cos he had grp work to do as well. Gee.. arent we geeks? Uni on a saturday.. when its holidays!

So i met up with Will after my group meeting was over.. and we went to his house. I wasnt there for long tho..cos Mel sms'd me and we decided to go to Kharles 21st. Since i was at Wills house anyways. So Mel came and got me from Wills and we drove over to Kharles in one piece. Mel's driving seems fine to me. Dunno what everyone else was talking about!

All the 4th years were in their tight circle at first.. but it was fine. We settled in and talked to Ling, Aaron and Zayra! We didnt stay there long.. tho we wanted to. Mel planned to go clubbing with some of her friends, and i went back to Wills.. so we could get to Wikas house warming.

Wikas place is really nice. Its quite spacious for an "apartment/flat" doey! When we got there.. the drinks were already opened.. and everyone was watching some Eddy murphy divX's. Hana and i got bored after the guys started watching transformers. So we went to fiddle round with Wikas guitar. Patty showed us some "get on up" moves.. while Ryan showed some talent with "More than words".

It was a good nite in all. As requested i finally uploaded the pics! Some of the ones at Kharles and stuff were blurry cos i had it on the WRONG mode! Whoops! I'll leave it on AUTO for now on! =D Next time i'll take more pics. And a movie too...

Well make sure u check it out!

Thats all from me. Happy Easter everyone!

posted by Minty @ 2:39:00 pm